Separating the self from chaos

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Yesterday I went to my ex-husband’s house to pick up my children. His mother answered the door. I have committed to a detachment from her considering the events that developed when we were completing the divorce. In short, she accused me of being money hungry when I have never asked for anything. She clearly  doesn’t know me. After 12 years, she still doesn’t know me. She was present for our son’s birth…but, she didn’t know me. Part of me thinks she chooses to not think of me as a worthwhile person because my belief systems challenge those of her own, but in truth, it doesn’t matter. I chose detachment and will no longer engage with her. When she opened the door, all I said was “hi” but didn’t feign complete adoration of her. She took it as me “being hateful” and proceeded to attack me with words and insinuations in the presence of my children.

Good job, super Catholic grandma. How many hail Mary’s are you going to need to do tonight to let go of your guilt for this one and ensure your place in heaven?

Chaos. She is sure chaos.

So what did I do?

I sat down and engaged with my ex. We talked about relevant topics and I gave her short clear answers when she asked me questions. She stood over me glaring like an angry bear that was hungry for confrontation. I did

n’t budge. I took deep breaths and kept my cool. Was I shook? Yes. But I didn’t let it control my behavior. We cannot always control how we feel; we can always control how we respond.

What I did was pull myself outside of the situation and viewed it as third person. I committed to not letting emotions overtake me because all those are are chemicals in the brain that are responding to fight or flight. I did neither. We have evolved past that. I stood my ground and did what needed to be done within the moment, then gathered my children and gave a warm goodbye to my ex and wished him well.

Admittedly, there was a little passive aggressiveness in how I responded, but no one is perfect. What I was not going to do was be a fake person and pretend that I have concerns and want to engage with a volatile personality.

In our relationships we can choose to engage or detach. If someone is abusive with you, it is usually best to detach. Don’t give them fuel. Let them fire up on their own, and burn out on their own, so all they have for later is self-reflection.

Karmic Spell

There are times in our lives where we feel that someone has hurt us tremendously and they deserve karmic law. Know that karma does exist and it will happen with time, regardless of any action on our part. However, if you would like to have it be a bit more expedient, and it makes you feel safer to commit to a karmic spell, there is an example here on

As with all spells, you must understand that what you send out will come back to you. I have done a karmic spell without realizing it. Did it work? Well, let’s just say that the person who did the injustice to me felt consequence within three days. And the emotional pain he put on me, he felt 3 fold. While I did not want him to hurt per say, because that is not what is in my heart, I felt hurt and wanted that pain to travel back to him….so hopefully he would leave myself and my children alone.

With all you do, try and practice with a pure heart.



Law of attraction in action


Anyone who has watched The Secret has an awareness of the law of attraction. Many celebrities stand behind the power of the law of attraction, including Oprah Winfrey and Steve Harvey. It’s a real thing. So what is the law of attraction? Simply put, whatever you put out to the universe comes back to you….which it is why it is so important to have positive thoughts. Too many of us think about what it is that we don’t want instead of the things we do want. It can work for you. If you don’t believe me, just try it with small goals first.

How it has worked for me? Every profound thing that has happened in my life over the last few years was a result of me using the law of attraction. I visualized the process by which I would get the job of my dreams, and it happened. I visualized the process by which I would start making more money, and it happened. I am not a millionaire by any means; however, this has never been my goal. I have made small goals for myself. Realistic goals. I visualized the process by which these goals might come to play…some might call it daydreaming. But to this day, it has always worked. What I have also done is listen to the universe for cues on when to take action. Not everyone can do this at first, but it is possible. When I wanted an easy divorce, I listened to the universe to tell me when the right time was. Everyone kept asking me “Why haven’t you filed yet?” …and I had good reason to not do it at precisely the right time. I waited. I waited until the day I woke up and the universe spoke to me and said, “Now. It’s now. Now or never.” I listened, and without going into much detail, the coordination of events that followed were nothing short of serendipitous and it happened exactly as I needed it to. It would not have happened that way at any other time.

The thing is, the universe will work with you if you listen. Have good intentions and a clear goal. Always know, however, that sometimes what we think we want might not be in our best interest, and the universe will put obstacles in front of us to protect us. If we are in alignment with the highest good, we can usually see what is right and what we should fight. So, when things do not work out, and you have done you part using the law of attraction, have faith that it is for the highest good. Maybe there are lessons to be learned that can be used for something greater later on.



Am I a natural witch?

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Chances are, if you came to this page, you ARE a natural witch. Are you more in tune with nature, do people’s feelings have a strong effect on you, and do you have intuitive dreams? If this is true of you, then you have a connection to the universe that allows you certain gifts. But… maybe what should be asking yourself is, “Why is it important for me to know if I am a natural witch?” When we experience extreme distress and feel the world is crumbling around us, or we are being profoundly hurt, or maybe sometimes we just don’t feel important or special, we try to find things within us to control or influence the situation. What you need to know is, even if you do not have a strong connection with the divine, you are important and yes, you are special. You were created, were you not? Therefore, you are important and you’re life has meaning even if you are not a ‘natural witch’. Also know that even if you do not feel that you have certain gifts, these things can be learned. We all have some form of connection. It is just a process of opening up our minds, our hearts, and learning to listen to the beat of the universe.

What exactly is a natural witch? What some might consider a natural witch is really just someone who is highly connected to the universe and those within it. Witchcraft in itself is a practice that dates back …well, probably from the time mankind became aware of his place in the world and realized there were scary things he couldn’t control. In essence, it was a means for control of one’s life and environment, and the perceived practice of ‘magic’. What was once considered magic is now being given different names, but that’s a topic for another day. As for the natural witch….well, we can feel people’s energy and we can influence things within our own lives. This also comes with the law of attraction -which we can all learn. A word of warning: When it comes to influencing others, we have to see where our heart is and be careful what our intentions are. To wish ill on others will inevitably come back to you. Of spells, they are simply mediums of focus.

My first spell was one of protection. I was eleven. No one taught me how to do a protection spell. I simply knew. I laid in my bed at night, afraid of the darkness that lurked, and visualized a white light that began within me and grew around me. It encircled my bed, my bedroom, and eventually my entire home. A spell can be simple, and like I said, it is a means of focusing your intention.

If you would like to explore the topic “Am I a natural witch” further, there are copious resources on the net, as well as some tests you can do for fun.

Here’s one quiz for entertainment purposes:  What Type of Witch Are You?

The damage of focusing on the external

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Yesterday I went to the DAV and found a formal dress from David’s Bridal, new with tags still attached. It was $139, but the DAV sticker said .75….and they were having a 50% off sale. I was overjoyed. Did I need the dress? No. In fact, the dress didn’t even fit anyone in my household, though I had hopes that at some time it might because….well, it’s nice to have just a random formal sitting around to be able to wear if the occasion hits. But seriously. Why did I buy it? What was it about the NWTs sticker that made it so valuable to me? I have no intention of selling it online, so it wasn’t for monetary gain. It was more about the illusion of status. As if owning an expensive dress gives me status or makes me worthy of something that I was unworthy of the moment before it fell under my ownership. 


This little scenario got me thinking, and as I was driving to lunch from work I noticed the same thing I notice almost every day. On a main street sat a homeless black man. He is an interesting character. Most days I see him walking in a wrap around garb, with long dreads and an intense face. He looks almost spiritual in attire and I often wonder if he has chosen this path to separate himself from the disease of consumerism that seems to have most of us wrapped around its fingers. But I don’t know, so I digress.

This man, who has seemingly nothing, is no better than I or the lawyer, judge, or postman that might walk by him on the same street -it’s downtown, so this scenario is not uncommon.  So I ask myself, why? What is it about this external focus that has most of us (seriously, like almost ALL of us) so tied up? And how does some object have the power to adjust my own thinking of myself? This is where the danger is. I know this. When we tie ourselves into things, money, status, and power over others…we fall short of what is real. We lose sight of what is actually real and important. When we have ‘things’ and we compare those ‘things’ to the things other people have, we are essentially comparing ourselves to other people. And what is funny about all this is it isn’t that we judge ourselves through our own eyes, we judge through theirs! We base our judgments of ourselves with how others see us. When we do this, we are saying their opinion matters more. And isn’t our opinion more important than any object? Isn’t the value we have in ourselves more important than that which others place on us, when essentially, they are doing the same thing. So, if I am here an I am judging myself on how another person sees me, and that other person is judging themselves on how they think I see them…isn’t it a bit ridiculous?

Long story short, I have already gone through this. For the most part, I see this thing for what it is and move past it. I try to live my life in integrity and find my own value within myself. But every once in a while, I have a little reminder….like when I go to the DAV to buy unnecessary ‘things’ for 50% off. We are all guilty. May we all work towards being better and learning to love ourselves as we are. When we do this, we will also love others for who they are, rather than who they are in reflection of ourselves.

Free Reiki Attunement

If you have ever been interested in alternative healing modalities using energy, do some research into Reiki. The International Center for Reiki Training describes Reiki as “Japanese technique for stress reduction and relaxation that also promotes healing.”

In Reiki healing, the universal life force runs through the practitioner to the client promoting healing and wellness. Though this was originally an eastern modality, it has made it to the west and has actually become quite popular in the United States.

For those wanting a free Reiki attunement, there are a variety of YouTube videos online, as well as websites that teach you the the history of reiki and how to practice. Free workbooks are available as well.

Those who have successfully made it to Reiki master might consider opening their own business as a Reiki practitioner. No special college degree or licensure is required, only the know how to access the healing energies is necessary.  One on one training is best; however, there is copious information on how to become a Reiki practitioner free online.


Prayer Candle

Focus on the candle and feel your intentions. Imagine a white light is surrounding you for protection and with a pure heart, envision the scenario you wish playing out in your mind. With this candle our goal is to bring an intention into reality.